Part 19|| Guns, Candlesticks & The Clock That Knows

“We meet ourselves time and again in a thousand disguises on the path of life.”

May 23, 2025

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“We meet ourselves time and again in a thousand disguises on the path of life.”
— Carl Jung

When Snuffy arrived at my place in South Beach, he texted, asking for my door code again. Despite pounding it several times a week, I could not remember that it was *4936. I was that nervous. I chalked it up to his Scorpio Rising.

I met him at the entrance, and this time he gave me a smooch that landed on the corner of the left side of my mouth. It was awkward and amusing. Suddenly, we were being formal, even though he said it was “kind of like we were married” due to the truck baby.

We were doing things out of order, like life was running a different script just for us. Today would be the day we’d see glimpses of our personas. He claimed he had not looked me up online or on social media until I told him I had. I wonder if he was being honest. I think the word he used to describe me was “accomplished.”

We had been texting intermittently for a year before I even looked him up. There was a tug, but I was too busy to pay attention to boys other than him. I know how picky I’ve become, and I knew this meant something.

Like me, Snuffy has many facets to his being, and although there were toxic traits, I felt that we brought out the best in one another whenever we actually interacted in person. Of course, I cannot speak on behalf of my “imaginary friend.”

“Snuffy, I haven’t heard from you in 11 days,” I said humorously.

We were facing each other in my kitchen.

I noticed that I spoke to him with odd familiarity.

“That’s light,” he responded and chuckled.

What did that mean? I thought, but I avoided asking about his avoidance.

I asked him if we could talk on the patio in the back of my building—I wanted to see him outside my apartment. He had the truck baby, but my mode of transportation was the bike-sharing system Citi Bike. I didn’t get out much, and my badass electric bike was with a friend in Howie of the Hills, in northern Florida, where I’d left most of my belongings when I tried to escape to Costa Rica in March 2023. I took 10 suitcases and a chaperone, but I only lasted two months before The Matrix locked me out of my bank account and pulled me back to America to “authenticate” myself. While in the jungle, I’d purchased a used Pathfinder, which lay there literally rotting for months, as Snuffy first told me he’d lost his car and only had a Harley.

As we walked down the hall of my building, he asked me if his “Pyu-Pyu” would be safe in my apartment since I had not locked my door.

He tended to talk under his breath, and I had an issue hearing.

“Say again?”

That’s what he called his guns. Turns out, he has his own lexicon and is full of original one-liners. Like moi.

I liked that he was armed, and I fantasized going to the range with him.

Phantom Ex & Parasitic Partners

Snuffy brought up his ex-wife. He said that she had “made” him marry her, and yet again, I didn’t ask what he meant, although I really wanted to know. I believe he’d met her on his birthday in 2019.

How had she “made” him tie the knot? He painted himself as a victim, and given that I didn’t merit the abuse I received from my ex, I believed him. However, ultimately it‘s up to each of us to take responsibility for the choices we make. Narcissists are usually teachers showing us our attachment styles and where we are not loving ourselves. This took me a few years to realize.

Interestingly, I was about the same age as him —36ish — when I discovered what an NPD or a Narc is. Today, I can write a thesis about narcissists based on my research and my unfortunate experience with the man I founded HoneyColony.com with. That story is far out, too. In fact, I wrote about it.

How I Lost My Partner to a Parasite is one of my best pieces.

How I Lost My Partner To A Parasite

MARYAM HENEIN

September 1, 2023

Read full story

When we returned to my apartment, I read to him how my malignant narcissist ex got way worse after he picked up a parasite, both literal and energetic, during a voodoo ritual in Haiti. You know, the yooj.

Since he and I had a business together, the breakup took years, and I spent another three years getting over him. Snuffy listened not just passively as I read about relationship hijacking and spiritual parasitism.

During our encounters, Snuffy and I have sometimes read things to one another. No other man has taken the initiative to read out loud to me, and I could tell he liked doing it.

Did he know I had a fantasy of sitting on the floor of an old library, surrounded by books and musty air, being read to by someone I loved? I had held that vision since I was a girl. I also liked reading things out loud and was grateful he was present and listened.

I shared with him that my research taught me about Love Bites, dark attachments, and parasitic relationships. This concept aligns with what Eve Lorgen calls the "Love Bite" phenomenon—orchestrated interference or manipulation in intimate relationships. The phenomenon is more common than people think, but deeply taboo.

My article essentially provides a real-life case study that mirrors this theory. After a year of shopping my story, I placed it in Quilette, a publication “for heterodox thinkers and ‘intellectual dark web '- adjacent voices.”

“People worry about sexually transmitted diseases, how about sexually transmitted demons?” my colleague Bernhard Guenther, who is behind the fascinating website Veil Of Reality.

Today, I realize that while I loved my ex, I didn’t have a heart or spiritual connection with him. And he certainly didn’t see my heart or love me back. Why had that been acceptable?

I wondered if Snuffy’s “phantom ex” loved his soul? A phantom ex is a past partner whose emotional imprint still haunts the present, appearing in comparisons, projections, or unspoken fears, even when they're no longer physically in your life. Sometimes, an emotionally unavailable person will use their phantom ex as a shield to create distance from a new person.

While Snuffy took a shower, I tried the link he sent me on my desktop, but I got rejected. I had been fixing my credit for a decade after an SUV hit me as a 29-year-old Canadian new to the United States Corporation. The lawyer swindled me out of $33,000. I chose not to sue the driver as I was grateful I was still able to walk, and I am a Canadian (read: I didn’t grow up with this lawsuit mentality). My credit still was not the best thanks to all the fuckery, embezzlers and mismanagement in my company HoneyColony that has unfurled since 2016.

Giza Clock Take Two & The Lion’s Gate Portal

We lay in bed in the dark with our respective smartphones, and he showed some of his …

Part 19|| Guns, Candlesticks & The Clock That Knows

“We meet ourselves time and again in a thousand disguises on the path of life.”

Phantom Ex & Parasitic Partners

How I Lost My Partner To A Parasite

Giza Clock Take Two & The Lion’s Gate Portal

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