Part 25|| La Madre, Snuffy, & The Shit Nobody Smells

Ayahuasca: Through the Vine of the Gods

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Part 1|| Stardust|| When You Remember Your Celestial Origins

Part 2|| Stardust|| When Stars Collide

Part 3|| Stardust|| Snuffalupugus, Planetary Parades, & A Truck Baby

Part 4|| Stardust|| Tristan As A Mouse & The Vertex

Part 5 StarDust|| A Kiss of Life, Guitar Plucks & Magical Kings

Part 6 || StarDust|| Four-Leaf Clovers, Fireflies, & Harlequin Novels

Part 7|| Stardust || The Deception of Appearances

Part 8 || Revised Contracts & Interference

Part 9 || Soul Merge & Love Making

Part 10 || Enter The Twilight Zone

Part 11 || Trump Near-Assassination, Timeline Jumps & Tracks

Part 12 || When Voltage Regulators Go Haywire

Part 13 || Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Part 14 || Would You Die For Him?

Part 15 || Is Snuffy Your True Twin?

Part 16|| Characteristics Of A Twin Flame Connection

Part 17|| More Characteristics Of A True Twin Flame Connection

Part 18|| Two Ships In The Night

Part 19|| Guns, Candlesticks & The Clock That Knows

Part 20 || Crypto, Soul Bubble & Pop

Part 21 || The Lion, The Gate, & The Toad To Remembrance

Part 22 || I AM The 1,2,3,4 & The 5

Part 23|| Sigils in the Soil: Soul Memory Recovery

Part 24 || Runner, Remember Me

“You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.”
— Friedrich Nietzsche

La Madre Ayahuasca

When I arrived at the ceremony in Homestead, I placed my yoga mat on the grass, away from the crowd, and sat in front of the fire, where I watched the flames dance. I breathed in the starry sky and burning pine. As usual, my mind fluttered from thought to thought as I waited for the medicine to be served.

Ayahuasca translates as "the vine that leads us to the world of the Gods.”

Traditional Ayahuasca is a brew of two main plants:

1. Banisteriopsis caapi (the vine) – contains MAO inhibitors (harmine, harmaline)

2. Psychotria viridis (the leaf) – contains DMT

The Shipibo-Conibo, Quechua, and other traditions see ayahuasca as alive and divine — a nurturing yet fierce feminine intelligence. People often describe the spirit of the plant as a conscious entity that teaches, heals, and disciplines — much like a strong, wise maternal figure.

That’s why it’s called La Madre.

When Snuffy visited me with his acoustic guitar, I showed him my circular-shaped oracle deck, The Wild Unknown Archetypes by Kim Krans. He told me he’d eyed it on my fireplace mantle. I’d observe that, like me, he was very observant. too. I was a Virgo Rising, which is your forward-facing self. He was a Virgo Moon, which represents the soul. I just somehow knew that he took in a lot more than he let on.

He pulled The Mother. He said he knew why he pulled that card, but didn’t share the information with me. The Mother card represents the full embodiment of the Divine Feminine in all her phases — Maiden, Mother, and Crone — unified into one sacred force. At the time, I interpreted it as a deep longing for that archetypal nurturance.

Perhaps when we met, the divine feminine entered our field. Maybe he had picked the card for me, too.

The true twin flame journey involves the Divine Feminine — it’s an initiation into full spiritual adulthood. It’s not about romance or obsession. It’s a fast trek to ascension, an opportunity to raise your frequency and evolve your soul. The path requires each person to balance the divine masculine and feminine energies within and grow spiritually, emotionally, and energetically.

Why?

Because the polarities on the planet have been inverted, men are being emasculated and women are praised for suppressing their softness, ensuring neither sex embodies their true divine essence. Love has devolved into diamonds instead of forever, and matrimony is no longer holy. It’s a racket.

It would be Snuffy who, in 2025, identified me as a Divine Feminine. I was working through a lot of betrayal, and he heard me talking to myself as I was doing yoga poses on the patio of my new place. Via text, he told me to drop the self-victimization talk. Then he told me not to beat myself up and move on. How did he know I was hard on myself? Was he talking to me or himself? I had so many questions I wanted to ask.

He was right, and while I was embarrassed, I was grateful for his insight and honesty. From the get-go, I automatically valued his input and matter-of-fact, astute perspective on things.

You may wonder what a divine feminine is anyway.

Consider it a woman living the best exalted version of herself. A ‘normal’ feminine is often a product of cultural programming. She may be beautiful and kind, but still entrenched in the matrix version of femininity, operating out of her lower chakras. Most women still anchored in the matrix respond to pain in a very masculine way — through control. They yell, punish, and demand. And let’s be honest, women can be vindictive cunts.

The Divine Feminine is the primordial intelligence behind creation, and when embodied in a woman, she is:

• Sovereign – rooted in self, not seeking completion

• Magnetic, not performative

• Channels chaos into creation

• Holds boundaries and grace equally

• Alchemizes pain

• Honors her body as a sacred temple, not an object

I had been on that path since the sister bees first flew into my life, but it was a process I’d put on pause. People would call me Queen Bee, and I found it arrogant. I told them I was a ‘Queen Bee in Training.’ But now post Plandemic….

I had been patiently waiting for more than six years to sit with Aya and myself again.

The Plandemic was the largest psychological and biological experiment ever conducted on humanity, and I am not going to mince words; CORONACON shattered my faith in humanity. I had PTSD, rage, and was deeply saddened. I worked too much, was in my masculine, out of balance, and was resigned to life.

Looking back, it was all Maktoub (written). I had manifested my own Great Reset into being as I was finishing my book. The unprompted Kundalini and sweet kiss reignited my divine spark. And now, with the help of Bufo and then Ayahuasca, I wanted to open the vault of my subconscious and go deeper to purify myself of unprocessed wounds like betrayal and anger. It was up to me to stoke the flame within. I wanted to reclaim my sweetness and become the love I was seeking.

The ancient Egyptians believed that if the heart is as light as a feather and the soul is deemed pure, one would be granted passage into the eternal afterlife. This wasn’t my first rodeo, and I wanted to find the EXIT. I’d been looking for the escape hatch, and I’d come to learn it was inside of me all along at my crown chakra.

While I had looked forward to going to St. Augustine with Snuffy, I knew that I was meant to be at this ceremony.

Looping Through Lands

As I stood in line to receive my small cup of ayahuasca and looked at the trees, I couldn’t help but think of the jungle. It was the only place my system had felt safe in years, deep in the mountains away from civilization. It got pitch black by 630 p.m., also known as ‘Jungle Midnight.’ I fell asleep each night to a symphony of sounds. I felt blessed to wake up to bees, boars, and butterflies, but I was also lonely, wishing I had someone to share the experience with. The people in the jungle were a bit too hippie for me, and the men looked like they needed to eat steak.

I first fled to Costa Rica with my ex, ‘Google Whistleblower’ Zach Vorhies, in March 2020, just six days before America went into lockdown. I returned to San Francisco six months later in September, arguably one of the worst places to be during the Rona Regime. They made chalk circles in the grass in the parks, and there were people in them. Karens harassed me, and I did yoga in a face diaper.

I felt like I was living in a Groundhog nightmare. I wrote in my journal, ‘There is no coronavirus in my dreams.’

In 2022, the very day I became a second-class citizen and was forced to eat outside of restaurants and flash a vaccine card to practice yoga, I said Namafuckenste and bought a one-way ticket to Florida. When I looked through my calendar, I learned that I landed in the Sunshine State on Snuffy’s birthday. I tossed it into the mounting pile of other meaningless co-incidents (read: sarcasm).

Costa Rica ⇒ SanFrancisco⇒ South Beach ⇒ St. Augustine ⇒Costa Rica ⇒South Beach = OOUFF

In April 2023, after losing my rental home in St. Augustine, where I had been for the past year, I schlepped 10 suitcases, recruited a chaperone, and moved to the jungle. I didn’t plan to come back ever. My landlady (the same one I had in 2020) notified me that I needed a 4x4 vehicle to access my remote casita. I sold furniture back in the United States and paid a mechanic named Juan $6,000 in cash — over several weeks — for a Toyota Pathfinder. I only drove it for two months.

I had to return because Wells Fargo somehow locked me out of my bank account. I returned to Miami to ‘authenticate’ myself, gave a talk on Transhumanism at General Michael Flynn’s ReAwaken Tour, and then busted my knee in an epic dance move at iconic Art Deco bar The Clevelander.

The car sat rotting in the jungle as I recovered from a knee injury in an overpriced 200 square foot shithole on 6th and Ocean Drive in South Beach. When Snuffy and I began texting, I found it odd that I had a vehicle I wasn’t driving in another country, while he needed one for work.

I offered to lend him, a complete stranger, money when I sold my car. I forgot about that part. But I only received $1,500 for the vehicle, and by the time I got the funds, I needed to unfuck the formatting in my George Floyd manuscript (now on Amazon).

Corona, Death Threats & Super Nasal Powers

I swallowed the bitter, muddy brew. It was gross and made me gag. I had a ginge chewy to make it palatable.

Ironically, the last time I did Ayahuasca — in July 2018 — was in Corona, California. "Corona" literally means crown — connected to the crown chakra, higher consciousness, divine remembrance. Ayahuasca is known for activating that very portal.

Was it a clearing before the collective descended …